Pages

Sunday, September 6, 2009

As I Was Hand Washing My Bras . . .

We have been experiencing unusually hot weather for the past two weeks and my bras are paying the price. The straps have turned a lovely shade of dirty brown and the sweat stains are disgusting. I have run out of bra rotations, even wearing the ever-so-tacky black bra with a white tank top out of desperation. In normal circumstances I would just throw all my bras in my super-expensive-high-energy washer on the delicate cycle, but my husband broke it. I am waiting patiently for the part to arrive to fix it, but my bras can wait no longer.

So, I was standing at the bathroom sink hand washing my bras, something I have never done in my life, and I think of my mom, who ALWAYS washed her bras in the sink. Here are some other weird things my mom did that I would NEVER do:

1. Buy "suntan" pantyhose. Remember how they made your legs look orange?

2. Hand wash ALL pantyhose, roll them in a towel, which sat on the bathroom sink for hours, turning a rusty shade of orange.

3. Dye her old white bras in the sink with teabags.

4. Wear a sanitary belt and preach about it's comfortability well into our 20's, as in, "You girls should wear a sanitary belt. It keeps everything in place."

5. Hang a red plastic douche bag over the shower head to dry.

Bring back any memories, girls?

Lela, survivor of a traumatizing childhood

No comments: