My New Entertainment

(Post-It Note Tuesday will return next week)

Yes, Urban Dictionary is my new entertainment. Yes, I know it's been around for a WHILE. But sometimes you go back and see the funniest things.

For instance, every woman knows what these are. We all have them in the back of the drawer "just in case":

Famine Underwear
The garments you wear during a shortage of underwear, when you haven't done laundry in several weeks or months. Usually characterized by lack of elasticity, holes (usually large and awkwardly located), stains, and typically are at least 5 - 10 years old. In some cases soccer shorts, underwear of unknown origin, thongs, bathing suit bottoms, or 'granny panties' can be considered famine underwear, but do not necessarily meet the above criteria.

I haven't done laundry in weeks, so I'm wearing my famine underwear, the boxers I made in home economics in middle school.

OR


My husband is very good at this. I would just throw that stuff away:

Soap Grafting

The act of attaching an almost completely used piece of soap to a new, unused piece because it is now too small to be conveniently used but you also don't want to waste it.

My mum always soap grafts because she doesn't want to waste anything. Soap grafting is good.

OR


I'm a master at this:

Stealth Call

When you have to call someone back but don't want to talk to them, so you wait until you know they can't talk and leave a voice mail.

"I don't want to tell Karen I can't make it tonight, so I'll Stealth-call her when she's on her flight and has her phone shut off."

So, now you know what I do when I'm procrastinating doing something I really need to do. There's some really funny stuff in there totally inappropriate for this blog, too. But still amusing. And no, it doesn't take much to amuse me.

***Ally